Finder is committed to editorial independence. While we receive compensation when you click links to partners, they do not influence our content.

Valentine’s Day 2022 jokes to make them laugh

Laughter and love go hand-in-hand, so make humour your Valentine’s Day surprise.

There is absolutely no reason why Valentine’s Day has be taken so seriously. In fact, Valentine’s Day will probably be more enjoyable if you keep the pressure off and have a little fun with it. To get you in the mood (…to laugh) here are some cheesy, silly jokes and ideas for how to make your Valentine giggle.


The best (and corniest) jokes for Valentine’s Day

So here they are: the best Valentine’s Day jokes that have tickled our funny bones and warmed our hearts. Awww.

1. What did one boat say to the other?

“Are you up for a little row-mance?”


2. Roses are red, violets are blue
That’s what they say, but it just isn’t true!
Roses are red and apples are too
But violets are violet, violets aren’t blue!
An orange is orange, but Greenland’s not green
And pinkies aren’t pink, what does it mean?
To say something’s blue when it isn’t, defiles it
But oh, what the hell, it’s hard to rhyme violet!


3. Hard Grader

My high-school English teacher was well known for being a fair, but hard, grader. One day I received a B minus on a theme paper. In hopes of bettering my grade and in the spirit of the Valentine season, I sent her an extravagant heart-shaped box of chocolates with the pre-printed inscription: “BE MINE.” The following day, I received in return a Valentine from the teacher.

It read: “Thank you, but it’s still BE MINE-US.


4. A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing “Love” stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them. His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes up to the balding man and asks him what he is doing. The man says, “I’m sending out one thousand Valentine cards signed, ‘Guess who?'” “But why?” asks the man.

“I’m a divorce lawyer,” the man said.


5. What is a vampire’s sweetheart called?

His ghoul-friend.


5. A prince was put under a spell so that he could speak only one word each year. If he didn’t speak for two years, the following year he could speak two words and so on. One day, he fell in love with a beautiful lady. He refrained from speaking for two whole years so he could call her “my darling.” But then he wanted to tell her he loved her, so he waited three more years. At the end of these five years, he wanted to ask her to marry him, so he waited another four years.

Finally, as the ninth year of silence ended, he led the lady to the most romantic place in the kingdom and said, “My darling, I love you! Will you marry me?” And the lady said, “Pardon?”


6. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. Their wedding ceremony wasn’t fancy.

The reception, however, was excellent.


7. What did the bat say to his girlfriend?

“You’re fun to hang around with.”


8. What happened when the man fell in love with his garden?

It made him wed his plants!


9. What did the Valentine’s Day card say to the stamp?

“Stick with me and you’ll go places!”


10. What did the French chef give his wife for Valentine’s Day?

“A hug and a quiche!”


11. Why did the pig give his girlfriend a box of candy?

“It was Valenswine’s Day!”


12. What do you call a very small valentine?

“A valentiny!”


13. What did the elephant say to his girlfriend?

“I love you a tonne!”


14. Do you think skunks celebrate Valentine’s Day?

Sure, they’re very scent-imental.


Dos and Don’ts for Valentine’s Day jokes

Your Valentine’s Day jokes should inspire a chuckle not a frown. Here are some little tips on how to nail humour on Valentine’s Day…

Do:

Keep it light. The trick to making your loved one laugh (even at themselves) is to joke about stuff that’s not so important.

Include yourself in the joke. Making fun of Valentines Day, or your loved one, or anything else is much funnier if you can laugh at yourself, too.

Puns are the way to go. Rarely offensive and so cheesy that you just have to laugh, puns are a safe option when cracking a joke on Valentine’s Day.

Things to avoid:

Stay away from jokes around stereotypes. Valentine’s Day is not the time to poke fun at anyone else’s expense.

Don’t on a sore spot. We all know that the ones we love can hurt us the most. They understand which buttons to press to get a particular reaction. Use this knowledge responsibly.


Some Valentine’s gift suggestions

Womanizer X Lovehoney Clitoral Stimulator
Womanizer X Lovehoney Clitoral Stimulator

Lovehoney

Cambridge Teapot with Infuser
Cambridge Teapot with Infuser

Grosche International Inc.


Best retailers for Valentine’s Day gifts


Valentine’s Day Deals

Deal

Up to 50% off select items

Deal

Up to 80% off epic deals

Deal

Up to 50% off sale

Deal

Up to 40% off books

Deal

20% off your order

Deal

10% off your first order

Deal

Up to 35% off sale

Deal

Up to 80% off sale

Code

10% off your first purchase

Code

15% off site-wide

Deal

Up to 50% off 100s of styles

Code

$40 off any annual subscription

Deal

Up to 40% off sale

Deal

Up to 50% off sale

Deal

Up to 70% off sale

Deal

Up to 83% off: Holiday Deals

Deal

Extra 25% off clearance

Deal

Buy one, get one 50% off sale

Deal

Up to 70% off sale

Deal

FREE delivery on orders over $35

Expires 10 Mar 2027
Deal

Up to 50% off selected products

Expires 11 Jul 2022
Code

FREE Shani Darden Retinol Reform with $25 spend

Expires 5 Jul 2022
Code

FREE Briogeo Super Avocado Kiwi mask trial size

Expires 4 Jul 2022
Deal

Up to 80% off gifts for her

Code

15% off flowers sitewide

Expires 31 Dec 2022
Deal

Up to 91% off local deals

Deal

FREE shipping on $75 orders

Code

15% off any order

Expires 31 Jul 2022
Code

15% off any product

Expires 1 Jan 2023
Code

15% off flowers sitewide

Expires 1 Jan 2023
Deal

10% off a 6-month subscription

Deal

30% off 6 cards

Expires 26 Feb 2028
Deal

FREE shipping on $150+ orders

Expires 1 Aug 2025
Code

6% off new customers sitewide

Deal

FREE shipping on orders over $120

Deal

Up to 70% off everything

Deal

Free shipping on $129+ orders

Expires 2 Nov 2025
Deal

FREE shipping on orders over $39

Deal

Free Shipping $50 order

Deal

Free Shipping on $150+ Order

Expires 1 Aug 2025

Popular Gifts & Flowers coupon codes

Last checked Code description Code
25 Oct 2021 10% off your first purchase BIG****
9 Oct 2021 15% off site-wide BR1****
4 May 2021 $40 off any annual subscription EXP****
14 Jun 2022 FREE Shani Darden Retinol Reform with $25 spend SHA****
14 Jun 2022 FREE Briogeo Super Avocado Kiwi mask trial size LUV****

More guides on Finder

Ask an Expert

You must be logged in to post a comment.

Go to site